Ever dreaded the word “middle age crisis”? Middle age crisis is a challenging period that happens to great portion of mature males and females and occurs typically between the ages of 45-60. The thing is, even though there are some common symptoms people experience age group, men and women as well as each person experiences middle age crisis differently. Some people for example and especially males buy a luxury car or seek the company of younger women that may be half their age. Women might get cranky and nervous because of menopause or go under the knife in an effort to regain their youthful appearance. Of course dating and relationships are negatively affected as well.
If the following statements sound familiar to you, then your dating life and relationships might suffer from middle-age crisis:
- You reminisce the old times when you were young and carefree and a serial dater. Most males and even some females go through a very unstable and immature period in their younger years and serial dates are actually very common in that age. Immaturity and lack of responsibility or excessive confidence are the reason why many dates or relationships hardly ever last at this age, However, as we grow older and we gain a better grasp of what we want, serial dating and having too many short lasting flings and relationships are a sign that you are going through a middle age identity crisis and you haven’t figured out what you want. Like everyone it’s common to reminisce your younger years, but you’ll have to accept that your dating and relationship decisions must be made in a more well-thought and mature manner.
- You feel tempted to stop dating peers or dump your partner and start dating someone younger than could be your son or daughter in age. Another common sign that you are going through a middle age dating crisis, is if you are constantly tempted by fantasies and thoughts to date someone younger, and in some cases half your age. If you are a 56 year old male eyeing college girls instead of women that are the same age as you (or at least near your age), it means that you are desperately trying to regain your youthful feeling of sexual power and confidence or no longer find people your age attractive. If you suspect it’s the first reason, you need to speak with a psychologist to address your confidence issues and eventually accept your lacks or weaknesses at this age.
- You go to extremes or pay enormous amounts to regain your youthful appearance and appear more attractive to your date. We all age sooner or later and even though we can slow down the clock, old age will eventually hit us. When the first signs of aging show up e.g fine lines and gray hair, we tend to panic and feel tempted or even proceed with costly procedures in an effort to regain our youthful appearance. Men for example might opt for hair transplants and females may opt for botox or go under the knife. While it’s perfectly fine and even suggested that you take care of yourself, going through such extremes in this age means that you lack confidence in yourself and fear that you may appear unattractive to others and your date. You have to realize that many of these procedures might may you look worse than before and contribute to an unnatural appearance that is certainly not attractive to any person of any age. So instead of consulting your plastic surgeon, perhaps it’s time to address the issue with a psychologist instead.
- You try to impress your date by doing inappropriate things like speeding up your car or suggest that you two go through an extreme sport. Remember when you were 20 and you were speeding up your car or trying to pull off the latest dance moves in an effort to impress your date? Things like that can be fun when you are a teen or 20-something but when you are 50 and do such things to impress your date, especially if they are younger, this is not appropriate and will make you look ridiculous or desperate. Keep in mind that at this age people get impressed by you because of your experience and intellectual abilities rather your latest car or dance moves so show these off subtly instead.
- You stop dating altogether for a long period of time because you no longer feel confident and attractive enough. Apart from serial dating like when you were 20, on the opposite side of the spectrum we have mature people that choose not to date for multiple months or years because they no longer have the energy to do so or don’t feel attractive enough. Especially when you have gone through bad dating experiences, going through dating stagnation can sometimes be an inevitable option. While it is perfectly fine to take short breaks from the dating scene, too long pauses will dramatically increase the chances of staying alone through the rest of your life. Whatever the reason you have stopped dating at the age of 40s, you should discuss the matter with a psychologist so you can address your concerns and eventually return back to the dating scene.
- Your go through extremes in your sexual life–you have too much or too little sex.Too much sex or too little sex and even complete withdrawal from having sex in some cases, is also another sign that you are going through a middle age crisis in your over 40 dating and relationships. Some people and especially males seek to re-live their youthful years by having excessive sex with multiple women whereas mature women are prone to make sex less because they are no longer in the mood or not feel attractive enough. The first is a risky and inappropriate whereas the second is often a sign of depression and lack of confidence. Either way, a dramatic shift in your sexual patterns at this age means implies a middle age issue that needs to be addressed.